I have been accused, on more than one occasion, of being spoiled. I will no longer argue with you, I really am spoiled, and have been most all of my life.

It's not like I've lived the Life of Riley or anything... I have just had a person or persons in my life that see to it that I don't want for much.

It started with my parents. Materially, I could not have asked for more growing up. I always had all the clothes I wanted. I had killer cameras and other gadgets. I got my own car as soon as I was legal to drive...

It's not like I didn't work (if lifeguarding can be called 'work'), but I must have been unbearable back then. I had sense of ENTITLEMENT that did not win me friends (except for other indulged little brats. What a fun clique we were!).

My ex also spoiled me, although he resented me for it, too. Such was the nature of our relationship, and it's best that we are no longer together. But I never REALLY wanted for clothes or furniture or a nice apartment when we were together.

See an unhealthy pattern? Mom and Dad took care of me, and then my ex? Oh yeah. That's living in reality. Except, it's SO not.

I never learned how to take care of myself. I have spent most of my life feeling as if the world owes me something, and being pissed off because it didn't give it to me.

I think that one of the keys to my depression being well under control (besides the self-esteem, but that's another entry) is that I stopped expecting the world to be handed to me on a platter, and started aligning my actions towards putting the world on my OWN platter.

And now, I spoil myself. And it's sweeter than ANYTHING I've ever been given.

In reading your comments today, I was wondering if your spoiled personality is reflected in your web address....as in Tim the Brat? hehe