Being a wired, Internet kinda guy, you can imagine that I check out my bank account online almost daily to see what the wacky auditors are up to.

So you can imagine my surprise this morning when I three fees of 25 dollars marked as "od internal fee" on my screen this morning.  This was even more interesting in that my account still had a positive balance.

There is no such thing as a private phone call in my office.  It's frowned upon to close doors around here, and I swear that there are people around here who can hear through floors, doors, walls and plumbing.  By that, I mean we have many NOSY people around here.  I should know... I'm one of them.

So a phone call to my bank is not in order.  I didn't really relish saying things like "Yes, the three hundred dollar charge to Buttplugs and Porn, Inc. is legitimate." in full earshot of all of my respected colleagues.  Fortunately, my bank is but a mile from my office, so as soon as lunchtime rolled around, I went to the bank.

Much to my dismay, I found I had to wait.  I hate waiting, but they were holding 75 bucks hostage, so what could I do?  I made myself uncomfortable in their lovely mauve chairs (which were a different color than the mauve carpet... doesn't a BANK of all places have enough money for a GOOD interior designer?)

The person who chooses the magazines for my bank's lobby is very, very sexist.  I had a choice between Field and Stream or Good Housekeeping.  I'm sure we ALL know what I picked up, right?

Did you know that Joy Behar has an advice column in Good Housekeeping?  How is a not-very-good stand-up comic qualified to give advice to a woman whose husband is losing his hearing?  Just because you're friends with Barbara Walters doesn't mean...  Oh.  Wait.  It DOES mean you can do whatever you want.

SO anyway, the lady at the bank couldn't figure out the weird charges either.  In fact, she looked at my account and congratulated me on not having any overdrafts since I opened that account, and said that even if I HAD overdrafted, she'd refund them, because they can do that a few times a year for people who are "good customers."

She then looked at all my accounts and figured out that if I upgraded my checking to an account that only costs one more dollar a month, I would get the other accounts for free, and save about five bucks a month, which was cool by me.

So a mistake on the part of my bank has netted me the ability to go to Starbucks one more time a month.  Whoo hoo!