Almost three years ago, I wrote an entry about turning thirty.  I wrote about how much I loved my life and how aging was wonderful, people respect me now, and I am more centered and isn't getting old wonderful?!

Bullshit.

During JournalCon, I was lucky enough to get a Bad Bar Weetamix CD from Weetabix.  This CD ROCKS... it's a nineteen track party on plastic, baby!  And one of those tracks is Tricky, by Run DMC.  I had not heard this song in over ten years, yet I knew every single line and verse of this utterly useless, yet cool as shit, song.  Seriously.  I even knew when they "HUH!" on the beat.  If you cleared all the useless lyrics out of my head, I could cure cancer, and I'm not even kidding.

So I'm all listening to the Bad Bar CD, and I have my windows down and my sunroof open and I am TOTALLY doing the White Man Dance (which actually does require a Volvo and a loose neck,) and damn if I didn't notice a group of teenagers laughing at me.  I don't always let that bother me, becuase I know I've got tons of life experience on them, and they don't even know from cool yet.

I really couldn't figure out why it bugged me so much, until I realized that when this song was new, I was their age.

So then I glanced in my rearview mirror and saw more grey hair in my goatee.  All at once, I felt old.  Not just old, actually... but Very Old and Uncool.  I have resisted the urge to get some of that Just For Men stuff and wash that grey right outta my beard, but I'm thinking I'll do that soon.

Grow old gracefully?  Sure.  As long I keep my neurotic secrets to myself.

A bit of trivia: every time anyone has ever exposed themselves, kissed an innappropriate person, or danced like they were the hottest person in the Bad Bar, the song Tricky was playing in the background. I am not making that up. The song is golden. I'm glad you're enjoying it!

I attended a miniature Italian family extravaganza yesterday, and in conversations with a teenage cousin, I discovered that Madonna is indeed the bomb. Apparantly, it's "awesome that she's so much older than Xtina and still cool. Too bad she coudn't find success when she was still young." No, I am NOT kidding. No concept of the Boy Toy, whatsoever.

Thank you so much for your comment, and Lord it did make me feel better. I think we should just get married for health insurance and tax purposes, and then we can just go around and whore our bad selves out. :D And I am so loving the Bad Bar mix, too. Last weekend at the bar some girl herad me talking about Depeche Mode and asked, "What is that?" WHAT IS DEPECHE MODE??? AAAA!!!! And Mare's above story scares the shit out of me. My God. Damn kids.

you KILL me.
I am 48.
(maybe I'll kill you...)
ah-hahahahahahaha
2 funnnnnneeeeee